Sunday, January 6, 2013

Day 6: Recovery

Today was kind of a rough one.

I know it was just a traffic violation with relatively minor consequences (considering the possibilities), but I can't get over it. I was regarded with such blatant hostility that I wasn't quite sure or not whether the officer was going to handle the occasion peacefully or not.

And I admit, its affected me. I didn't know I had some underlying fear of the authorities until this happened. It was well within his power, should his will determine it, to totally screw me. Points on my license, nearly double the fine.

When he "cut me the break" of only giving me 112 dollars worth of a ticket, I thanked him, gratefully, a humble little citizen. I was so terrified of the situation and so eager to flee that I literally almost got an accident  immediately after leaving as a motorist sped down the exit ramp I was pulled over on.

I lost some sleep, some focus, and motivation over these last two days. My exercise routine has swayed, my desire to improve has diminished. But as today went on, I took the time to breathe and focus, and try to refresh myself. As time passed, I felt a sort of weight pass off of me and became more and more relaxed. And now, I think I can free myself of the fear and apprehension and return to my previous swing.

Today, I was able to free myself of my fears and refocus on my self-enrichment.

Daniel, of course.

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